Unspoken Verses

Delusions as a concept exists because reality is supposedly shared. Because we have an idea of shared reality, we have the idea of delusions, and when people's realities go beyond or away from the shared reality, we call them delusions. And yet, how you go beyond shared realities is a very interesting topic in itself. On the one hand, there are the people who are creating their own realities everyday. Something made up out of the mind. And since that has happened, they are seeing something that no-one else is able to see, so the delusion seems obvious. On the other hand, there are the people who are able to see things others aren't. The very fundamental qualification of a leader is their ability to see. To perceive a possibility and visualize a path to it that others cannot. A leader is able to see the details of a possibility that others can't. An artist is able to see a picture in great detail in their mind, before they ever put it on paper. Don't get me wrong...

 So a lot of things happened. I am not sure where I left you guys the last time, but here's some updates. I have now been working at my big tech company for about 4 years. The plan was to do it for 3 years, then get out and work on something more meaningful to me. But there were a few more things that happened in between. I got into yoga and meditation big time for about 2 years.  It was the kind of getting into yoga and meditation, where people meet you after a few months, and do not recognize you, because you look different, you talk different, and you generally have a different air about you. I was deep enough, that I would wake up at 3:40 am everyday and sometimes be doing 2-3 hours of yoga a day before going into work. This one time I went 5 days while eating about 3 oranges, and 1 lunch -> that too was mainly because I got tired of the fact that I wasn't hungry. I also remember sitting at work one day looking very intently at my skip manager, and suddenly seeing the c...

2+2=4 is a fact. A universal fact. an absolute fact one would say. But informationally (if I may make my own words) speaking, it is limited. Let me be a bit clearer. Someone, somewhere, someday wrote an equation, 2x + 3y = 5; they tried multiple values of x and y, and found that it looked like a line. Someone else, tried out another equation, 3x + 8y = 24, and they realized this equation also looked like a line when it was plotted. Someone then tried this with a few more numbers and realized, that a line looks like this ax + by = c where a,b,c are constants, and x,y are real numbers. This new equation with variables, was informationally superior to 2+2=4. It related a set of numbers instead of just a couple of specific numbers, and it defined properties of theirs. However, it added variables, or uncertain numbers to the equation, and for it to be true, it defined domains for those variables. Thus, one could argue, trading off certainty or even even absolute-ness for informat...

привет That's "Hello" in Russian. That's how all the text around here looks. Anyway, so I'm someone who kind of did a deep study of the sexes and the human behaviour in Kota. And right when I was starting to think I'd seen it all, I came here. I'm here with about 25 students from college.. 15 boys, and 10 girls. This is day 4 of my arrival in Kazakhstan. I made friends with a guy, and the way I work with a new place is, I wanna usually find someone smart, be friends with the local people, and know how the society here works. As Indians, who watch American TV, and American movies and read news about the United States of America, and go to the United States of America, we are somehow wired to see all Caucasians/White people, as similar to Americans in behaviour. We expect, friendly, open people, who talk and make friends. Then we also expect, that even if the friendship may lead to more, they don't discuss in large groups, (like a group of le...

So this isn't a typical post which compares the two sexes and/or pits them up against each other, or their behaviour or so. I am a man, and a man's head is all I perceive, then again, there may be no such thing.. maybe it's people of different types. But there are certainly, some gender roles, women have broken out of many, but not men, and I don't think the male ego itself allows them to. So the idea that I'm walking towards is, vulnerability. I think, on their own, alone, single, men do/did not feel many things. There is a shield. You know, like rocks in a vessel of water, you throw it in, it makes a few waves, that bounce back from the vessel, and calm out soon enough. Men, who could be warriors, fighters, because, they had been able to, with the help of anger or sadness be insensitive, or numb to others, to their own pain, to not have compassion, to be, animalistic and fiery and merciless. To numb out their own pain into anger. And yet, inevitably, the wo...

Fuck it. I'm weird now. Hello all, I'm basically really brain dead for a while now, like I saw a movie in which some guy called this whole phase thing a melt down resulting from having worked too much for a while, and I'm hoping it's just that and nothing more. But not so sure. If I had to fit into that above theory, I'd say maybe the hard work from during the exams plus the sister's wedding(yea, that was a nice event in my life, my sister's gotten married. That room now solely belongs to me. :P) And then right after that college with the looming projects and personal goals I'd set for myself, is the combined cause for the meltdown. Then again, it might be cuz I don't really have much friends in Jaipur. Something screwed me up from Kota, and it had lingered at the start of my time in college, and so I stayed aloof enough, now, it's too late to be making friendships. And my old friends in Delhi, well, it's always great to meet them wh...

The only fear you need Is fear itself Cuz that's the one That makes you delve Deep, so you never fear my dear, And may you never scared, Be weep.

During swimming lessons, while going from one shore to another, I would paddle for a distance, and as soon as I saw the shore/ end of the swimming pool being within my floating range, I would stop paddling, and wait, as I floated towards the end. There, I could just hang, safe; and regain my strength and energy for another paddle. I'm floating home this weekend.

As seen by me.

When we're young, our assessment of ourselves is, a large part, what others say or think about us. As a consequence of that, we place ourselves at a certain height say x on a measuring scale. That is, we're in mid-air, of an assessment, the basis of which we're not clear about. And without understanding the functioning, and taking a reference level at x, we start to assess further. I think, its important to go all the way down to zero, and build from scratch. Its the only way you know how firmly you're grounded, and its the only way you really appreciate whatever height you reach. I think, its okay to hate yourself a bit for some time sometimes. Thats how you start building better. I have.

[Here's a test if you wanna try] [Read about it here] INTJ - (mine) To outsiders, INTJs may appear to project an aura of "definiteness", of self-confidence. This self-confidence, sometimes mistaken for simple arrogance by the less decisive, is actually of a very specific rather than a general nature; its source lies in the specialized knowledge systems that most INTJs start building at an early age. When it comes to their own areas of expertise -- and INTJs can have several -- they will be able to tell you almost immediately whether or not they can help you, and if so, how. INTJs know what they know, and perhaps still more importantly, they know what they don't know. INTJs are perfectionists, with a seemingly endless capacity for improving upon anything that takes their interest. What prevents them from becoming chronically bogged down in this pursuit of perfection is the pragmatism so characteristic of the type: INTJs apply (often ruthlessly) the criterion "Does...

If you have integrity, nothing else matters. If you don't have integrity, nothing else matters. - Alan K. Simpson You know, at the end of the day, you really learn a lot more from failure than you do from success. Its simple. When you find a method that doesn't work, you start searching for one that does. On the way you gain an understanding of how things work. You observe your actions and their consequences - disattached from both, and with a lot more objectivity. You understand that the failure won't define you. You learn to respect both success as well as failure, and you learn to fear neither. If you go deeper, you might even realise that success is, but a word. That when you weren't looking deep enough, it was something big, but when you did, you realised that (in the general sense of the word as used by the society) its just society appreciation. So while to one person, success maybe appreciation from the society, to another, it could just be a sense of satisfac...