Unspoken Verses

Ok. People here are pretty fucked messed up. I have decided to keep my blog clean of bad words( see the Heck in capitals in the Bansal Classes post? That had been a 4 letter word with the letters f, u, and k in it. And no, it wasn't 'Funk') but then few other words would describe it more suitably. Now you'd probably expect me to elaborate right? Its too much typing yaar, jus take it cuz I said it na? I mean if you really were that much of an analytical-wanna-know-proof-scienceboy/girl, you'd have been here in this stupid git of a place with me. (ok thats really not true, but if you didn't notice I'm irritated and irrational right now. Oh and its like fun. Infact I'm trying not to get carried away with the feel good factor and am actually refraining from passin comments about one more coolio right now, cuz the coolio reads this dumb blog.) Anyway, so in the class, this sheet of paper had fallen on the floor from the girls' desk(all the girls sit in t

21 Sept 09 So I'm sick. No, not in the metaphorical sense. I have a bit of fever. Its called havin -it-will-make-u-stop- givin -a-crap-bout-the- conc -of-H+ ions-in-a-0.2 Molar-ammonium chloride-solution. Thats why I'm not finding the answer to that question right now. Its the fever. From my side, I'm highly committed. So anyway, 1st n foremost, I wanna show my gratitude and alarm to all u folks reading this blog (yes, both of you.) Gratitude, cuz I didn ' actually expect anyone to read it (and special thanks to smelly cat for her appreciation of the poetry. the last complement was the best i could ask for i think. :D ) Alarm, cuz some of you are genuinely findin it interestin . This is the next day. I had started writin the note, but the fever got to me n I jus slept. I'm still sick. Today its called you- wil -have-to-do-physics- inspite -of-this-loser-of-a-virus. Haven't told my parents bout it, cuz yesterday(adorable as they are) they got too worried,

Hey you. Yes you. Go away. N then I wait. But yet you stay? Are you gay? Not the men touchin men way, Cuz thats okay, But the doormat that stays, inspite of being told to go away. Ah wel, let me ignore then. And play with my fountain pen. See how it squirts the ink! I coloured blue the sink. I don't like the colour pink. And you're still here, Starin at the screen. You're weird dear, N have lil self esteem. Cuz you still linger. Waitin for me to show the finger? U think m bein rude? By not offering food to ur cute lil ego, Ah wel I might as wel go, Cuz u jus won't. Yes I'm Jekyll, And I'm Hyde, and every nice poem, I will neutralize.

So why do we run after glitter Or Bright flashin lights Doesn gold seem but fitter To seek concrete delight I mean it does come from stones N diamonds from black mines But does it matter what makes the tone, When the music is divine? All that glitters is not gold, N often all that is gold does not glitter, Yet we seek the rainbow in the sky Which is essentially just a lie An illusion, a trick of the eye N we forget to look at the dirty swamps on the ground Where you may find lotus growin sound. Even the diamond n the gold in your ear, The ones you flaunt to your peers N talk bout the glam shops they came from, Even they have once adorned, A carbon mine, been an equal to the black coal, Cuz in its soul, Even Diamond is simply complex coal.

16 th Sept 09. So is it just me or do other ppl also walk around thinkin in a talkin to urself manner? Like this question i posed, I had already thought to myself while washing my hands(had gone to pee. ok y u lookin at me like i'm a weirdo for sayin that? I mean EVERYONE pees. Except for those on dialysis, but they don't have a choice. Given a choice, they'd rather pee anyday . U could ask them if u don't believe me. Besides look at the good side. I do wash my hands. :D) Ugh. My apologies. (recall what bracketts are for) So anyway comin back to that question. Wait. Nah. Too boring. I haven't told u guys much bout the institute I'm studyin in n all na ? Wel , Its name is Bansal Classes. The story goes, that once upon a time, 3 guys left their jobs in chemical industries in Kota , cuz the company was dyin anyway, n those chemicals were fatal too, n they didn't really want to be around so much death, cuz if they had they'd have been patholo

14 th sept 09. So on special request,( sounds so cool na ? Yes. Its still the spade theme. I'm exaggerating a non- chalant suggestion into a special request) I decided to squeeze in a post on Delhi n my stay in it. Now, its not gonna be a nice read, cuz up until this moment (of course, i'm talking bout the moment when i was writing, n not when u are readin this post. Sometimes i wonder if i overstate the obvious? I wonder why I wonder that.) I have had no thoughts on Delhi whatsoever, like except for it bein my home, and an amazin place, and some other thoughts i might have had at various points in my life considering i did live there for pretty long, but u get the point right? I mean there is this guy in my head who keeps pointin out technical flaws in my sentences n i can't even shoot him, cuz hez like in my head. So anyway, I was talkin bout how this wil probably be a sucky post, which wil deter furture special requests ( which brings me to a very importa

So one thing I've learnt recently is, its no fun to call a spade a spade. Its more fun to call it the black card that can capture your soul. That way people listen when you talk. Now, surprising as it may be, that has absolutely nothin to do with what I plan to write further. Although i couldn be too sure. Cuz u see, i don't plan a lot. So needless to say I haven't planned what i'm gonna write. M gonna make it up as I go. ( Ofcourse , I have a feeling thats probably why i'm writing to you from Kota , but the day I'm sure its why, I'll start planning.) So i jus returned from Delhi like a few days back. Ofcourse this trip wasn't planned either. I'd been wallowing in my situation n talked to this friend who was very kind to listen to me n we concluded I needed a break. So I called up my mom, told her i'm coming home tomorrow ( asked her actually, but told sounds cooler - the same not calling a spade that concept - N at this point I owe you

Oh i'm here, cuz i wanna write a song. Something thoughtless and long. Neither right nor wrong. Jus a superficial blah blah song. But wait where is the music? Or the lyrics about a hot chic? There are some more bad words that end in 'ick'. But using them might be too sick. So i won't. Did i just type out crap? In perfect rhyme scheme? I should have taken that nap. Or atleast decided a theme. Before i told u that i wanna write a song Something thoughtless and long. Neither right nor wrong. You realise how this plans to be long? I'll repeat stuff. N u will keep reading. N to make it more borin, this line duz not match the rhyme scheme. There, i'm a sadist, i'm crazy. My thoughts are unclear n hazy. But i'm basically jus too lazy. And you have too much time on your hands. Cuz you're still reading this mindless rant. Gah, I haven't repeated in a while. Gah, I haven't repeated in a while. Wow, those two rhymed so well. So this one wil not at all.

So i sit with the books open at 12:30 in the night. Quite unable to really bring the subject to light Cuz comprehension seems to be an inaccessible girl. And distractions more than jus abound in my world. And my phone jumps up, glowing on the bed. And a message shows what a friend has jus said. Isn't happiness most important in life? Is givin it up really worth this strife? I ponder a moment and send a reply That seems to claim something very high. But in my mind, i can't even deny, This is misery, n my text a lie. So i convince me, its yin and yang, Live some more and you'll get a hang. Of how life goes, some friends some foes, thorns enshroud a pretty rose. there is good n there is bad, there's happy n jus sad, so don't be mad. Cuz the glass is half full if its half empty. Living, inspite of all remains tempting. And at the end there is always death. The wiping clean of the slate, where you finally escape your fate, your misery, but also leave your love, your fami