Unspoken Verses

He stared up at the ceiling of his coffin. There were bricks on his chest. No wonder it was so hard to get up. He closed his eyes some more. Darkness. Comforting and stable. He opened his eyes and with a summon of strength, removed the quilt from his body. Sitting up on his bed, he looked past the dingy walls of his room and peered into the mirror ahead. They called him Wolverine. A nickname coined because of his hair, beard and a largely serious demeanour. He stared at the image in the mirror. Lately, the scars had stopped healing. Must be the cold ... He looked at his knuckles. The holes where the claws had retracted, still visible ... He went and stood in front of the mirror and folded his arms to his chest, with his knuckles facing inwards. His claws shot out. Followed by blood. He retracted. There was pain, but what was more profound, and even enjoyable was the adrenaline. The strong rush of adrenaline. He observed as his body washed out all other thoughts from his head, focussing...

22nd Feb 2010 Right now, i'm travellin back home at about 100kmph. There are stretches of grass covered land for as far as the eye can see, on both my sides, and an occasional truck or advertising board zippin by. Kota seems distant now, which is rather suprisin, it jus feels unreal. N in a strange way, i guess i'll miss it. I mean its fair why they say there's no price to freedom. :P Remember how i'd talked bout my pride at not-carin-how-i-look was unfounded? Wel i now don't care how i look at a whole new level. It probably started with bein perceived strange for wearin shorts. It led to apathy for others' perception at a nicely new magnitude. As of now, my hair is unruly, wild, long, n crazily curly. N I have a fairly dense beard. My parents have been naggin me to get them cut.( Thats kinda when I really started cherishin my far left behind solitude) :P Neway, jokes apart, I think at the end, I really do seem to like Kota-the adventurous experience . If only...

I'm a few days away frm the sea shore now. And this is among my last few posts. So reflectin back, I'll make an attempt to condense many thoughts into words... which appears a seemingly impossible feat right now - but then so did what I did. The following will be posts that I never got around to postin for reasons I don't recall. Some maybe abruptly incomplete, some may lack flow, n some may not even say anything at all. So i'd like to say, What the hell does it matter anyway? Now since my feedback bout the ppl here comes off as excessively negative, let me write bout some of the things they are pretty cool at. Given they are fairly intelligent, they are also pretty funny. Like in classes, a trademark thing that everyone does is shout maaro maaro, todo, kaato ( burn thrash destroy - stuff an angry mob wud shout) for simple tiny randomly trashy things. Like - if some guy's enterin the class a bit late, or the marker stops workin, or while some guy's askin a dou...

Heylo. So I am kinda not sure if i'm feelin sarcastic enough to do a blog post but I'm gonna give it a try. I realised I haven't enlightened you about the traffic rules guidelines here. Now I know, hailing from Delhi, I dun exactly have the right to be commentin about the traffic here. But incase u didn notice, I did not create that traffic right? I'm not responsible for it. N some of what I'm about to say may even (or may not - I'm not sure which, cuz wel, I'm not sure bout what I'm gonna say. I make it up as I go along. Its my favourite kind. I've already told ya I'm not a planner remember?) apply to Delhi (isn it like buggin when there is so much stuff in the bracketts that you forget what the real issue was?) So yea. We were talkin bout the traffic guidelines . A red light implies, that if u really dun mind stoppin, please do? I mean I know the long road ahead, the roar(or coughin pretty often) of your engine n the black fume sputterin ve...

So i'm generally pretty happy these days n all, like whether its because my days here are comin to an end, or whether because the cat drank my milk-the joy of feedin a hungry animal(and scarin it away when you find out thats happenin- No, not that i'm sure. The cat drank MY MILK. MINE MINE MINE. I dun think thats happy) or what really, i'm not sure. But the point is, i am, content-ish. Maybe its a body thing. It can't be unhappy for too long itself. I'm don't even mind my somewhat creepy friendish house-mates either! (who btw kinda eve teased away the girls livin in the house across the street. I am livin wid leches who walk in groups, n pass comments at girls or if in a more civilized environment, express their fantasies to eachother. Like atleast they used to wid the girls in that house. The steppin out of the femme from shimla was often met wid shouts of "shimla mirch" (capsicum which literally translates as the spice or chillies frm shimla). altho ...

First of all, WELCOME to 2010. I'm so glad, 9 is over. Suckiest year ever. I'll have you know that i had a sucky 31st december too. Was like the icing on the cake(that got eaten up by the street dog, even though u spent a fortune tryin to procure it - i'm explainin how it was a bad thing) Secondly, Welcome to my first post in 2010. I'm in Delhi again. And since i can't post pics from Kota, I will now. These are some of the sky ones I'd forgotten to post the last time It looks like the sea, but its the sky. The most beautiful blue i've seen. This one's around sunset. And those colours, I've never seen in a sky. Incase you saw this pic, and thought to yourself, OMG, IS THIS THE ONLY FREAKIN MALL IN THE PLACE OR WHAT? the answer would be the complement of 'or what'. The following, are a couple of snaps of the deluxe bus I'd taken to get to Jaipur. The empty space is where the fan should have been. I couldn't take too many snaps, cuz...

So first, and foremost, I wanna commend you guys on your survival skills, and your blind optimism, for being back to read this blog, even after the torture of the last post. Because, seriously, I dun think even I can get myself to read that post again,(I mean in spite of the fact that its like written by me!!!). The very rules of narcissism categorically talk about the ability to love and admire your own creations, irrespective of their crappyness. So a very genuine sorry to all of you. Meanwhile, I've just returned from Delhi, it was my mom and dad's 25th anniversary, on the 18th. There was a nice large family celebration, for which I made the sacrifice(-sniggers-) of a few classes. So the train journey was interesting. I reached the station about an hour early, and spent time reading, Chetan Bhagat's one night @ the call centre ( I know i'm a bit late to be readin that one, but mom hadn given it a great review, and the cover didn't look appetizing either - dun s...

Hey, Whaddup? I don't actually have anything to say.. like my brain is fairly numb and not whizzing like it usually is. There's obviously too much lead in the air. And thats probably the reason why i scored so shit in the exams last time. The thing is that, by now, the desire to bring to your notice the extreme differences in the societies, is having an overwhelming competition with my other significant attribute. Laziness. And the latter is winning hands down. ( part of the reason bein that its like too lazy to do a hands up right? cuz like its lazy) The deal is simply that, its a young society ( not in age or wisdom and that kinda stuff, but in exposure to things like multinational food industries, fashion industries, eating out routines, tall buildings - read on for proof - and other such stuff). So I didn't really express any shock at the fact that a guy who wanted to use the lift in a building, pressed the up arrow even though he wanted to go down. And when I asked him...

18th nov 09 So here's an experience worth sharing. Right now, I'm in my kitchen boiling some milk for use tomorrow, n I can hear a loud racket outside on the street. There are a no. of men on motorcycles, n on foot, walking with a vehicle which is here called a tempo, or a mini truck. There are two men along with this troupe of people who are playin the dholak. The truck is stacked to the brim with more ppl. And on the truck is a loud speaker, requesting ppl to vote for Mr. Ramgopal Nagar. Welcome to the scene of election campaining. About a few minutes back, I had heard, along with the dholak (a kind of drum.)and the loudspeaker (both of which had not managed to incite my curiosity enough to actually go and check out whats happening, cuz the dholak players and the loudspeakers had been moving around the locality for a few days now) unfamiliar voices emanating from down stairs. Out of curiosity, I exited the kitchen and went to peer down from the terrace, at the commotion belo...

So wel, i won't really be typin much here, but wil be doin the one thing that i can't from kota, posting pics. Most of these will make Kota look like a very pretty place. Please understand, thats just the awesomeness of the photographer. Ok, that was a lie really. God LOVES to paint up the sky there, its just brilliant. So there, i grudgingly praised one aspect of Kota. The skies are beautiful. The ALMIGHTY is one fantastic artist. And the most brilliant now i think... The next picture, is a photograph of the cycle stand in the coaching institute i'm attending, the photograph has been taken from the 1st floor. ( camera phones are not allowed within the institute.) The cycles depicted, are the cycles of the students who have dropped a year, and even in that of those who do not use autos. so its only a fraction of bout 1/3rd of the total no, of students present in the institute. here goes nothin... These are pics of the same, taken from the 4th floor, by another student...

Ok. People here are pretty fucked messed up. I have decided to keep my blog clean of bad words( see the Heck in capitals in the Bansal Classes post? That had been a 4 letter word with the letters f, u, and k in it. And no, it wasn't 'Funk') but then few other words would describe it more suitably. Now you'd probably expect me to elaborate right? Its too much typing yaar, jus take it cuz I said it na? I mean if you really were that much of an analytical-wanna-know-proof-scienceboy/girl, you'd have been here in this stupid git of a place with me. (ok thats really not true, but if you didn't notice I'm irritated and irrational right now. Oh and its like fun. Infact I'm trying not to get carried away with the feel good factor and am actually refraining from passin comments about one more coolio right now, cuz the coolio reads this dumb blog.) Anyway, so in the class, this sheet of paper had fallen on the floor from the girls' desk(all the girls sit in t...

21 Sept 09 So I'm sick. No, not in the metaphorical sense. I have a bit of fever. Its called havin -it-will-make-u-stop- givin -a-crap-bout-the- conc -of-H+ ions-in-a-0.2 Molar-ammonium chloride-solution. Thats why I'm not finding the answer to that question right now. Its the fever. From my side, I'm highly committed. So anyway, 1st n foremost, I wanna show my gratitude and alarm to all u folks reading this blog (yes, both of you.) Gratitude, cuz I didn ' actually expect anyone to read it (and special thanks to smelly cat for her appreciation of the poetry. the last complement was the best i could ask for i think. :D ) Alarm, cuz some of you are genuinely findin it interestin . This is the next day. I had started writin the note, but the fever got to me n I jus slept. I'm still sick. Today its called you- wil -have-to-do-physics- inspite -of-this-loser-of-a-virus. Haven't told my parents bout it, cuz yesterday(adorable as they are) they got too worried, ...

16 th Sept 09. So is it just me or do other ppl also walk around thinkin in a talkin to urself manner? Like this question i posed, I had already thought to myself while washing my hands(had gone to pee. ok y u lookin at me like i'm a weirdo for sayin that? I mean EVERYONE pees. Except for those on dialysis, but they don't have a choice. Given a choice, they'd rather pee anyday . U could ask them if u don't believe me. Besides look at the good side. I do wash my hands. :D) Ugh. My apologies. (recall what bracketts are for) So anyway comin back to that question. Wait. Nah. Too boring. I haven't told u guys much bout the institute I'm studyin in n all na ? Wel , Its name is Bansal Classes. The story goes, that once upon a time, 3 guys left their jobs in chemical industries in Kota , cuz the company was dyin anyway, n those chemicals were fatal too, n they didn't really want to be around so much death, cuz if they had they'd have been patholo...

So one thing I've learnt recently is, its no fun to call a spade a spade. Its more fun to call it the black card that can capture your soul. That way people listen when you talk. Now, surprising as it may be, that has absolutely nothin to do with what I plan to write further. Although i couldn be too sure. Cuz u see, i don't plan a lot. So needless to say I haven't planned what i'm gonna write. M gonna make it up as I go. ( Ofcourse , I have a feeling thats probably why i'm writing to you from Kota , but the day I'm sure its why, I'll start planning.) So i jus returned from Delhi like a few days back. Ofcourse this trip wasn't planned either. I'd been wallowing in my situation n talked to this friend who was very kind to listen to me n we concluded I needed a break. So I called up my mom, told her i'm coming home tomorrow ( asked her actually, but told sounds cooler - the same not calling a spade that concept - N at this point I owe you...

Wel i'm back, its about 9:00 pm, and i'm walkin back home from the mess after dining alone for the most, and then being accompanied in the activity by a guy wid a cap worn backwards..like Govinda did i think..? :P . Speaking of the mess, thankfully i found one that duzn cater to a thousand students in a humid and sweaty kitchen. This one has an AC, n a tv. Both luxuries now. Among the good things, I'm the eldest in my building! N by that i mean, jus a difference of one year. Yet they address me as 'bhaiya'. Its new, but its nice. Delhi, is something of a power jungle, where respect is proportional to success. ( and most often success to money) n i'm obviously no success. But i can kinda see most of my housemates being one. And i like the humility they have. Its refreshing. I'll exit now. Studies await like a pet dog for the master. Except, i'm not the master. Ps- Ever seen an LCD DVD player in an auto? I did. :P PPS- my friend's girl gave her persona...

3:00 p.m 15th July, Sat. Its been a nice rainy day so far..n i'm on to my second post,(i probably didn't think i'd get this far, but then i probably didn't think that i'd end up in Kota) i'm still alien to the way ppl think around here, quite frankly i am kinda disgusted by their perception of women here, its like the men are sex starved, cuz they have pretty much never enjoyed a conversation wid the opposite, so they treat them like sex objects, the key to attaining which lies in earning lots of money through iit, n then goin to their parents and askin for marriage. And i'm talkin bout the teachers too, one of whom while explainin how to deal wid the mental block of not being able to solve difficult questions during an exam , told us how he would relax his mind by having water, " But u can't do that after every question, so i would just sit n look at some attractive objects in the room" , the word he used was 'aakarshaniya padaarth', ...

So after an excrutiatingly disjoined start, i plan to restart what i once started, n hopefully stick with it(that a PCD song? :P we'll get there someday i'm sure). As of now, i'm sitting on my desk in Kota,with a physics module opened to page 1, and about 20 questions seem to be starin at me. N i can safely say its not too much effort to ignore them. Infact, i'm used to people starin at me now. I'm a loosely clothed, shorts wearin, stubbled loner in the education village of Kota. I break into English when i wanna express myself better. THAT doesn't help in Kota. For the unaware, Kota is somethin of an education capital of India.. atleast for IIT JEE aspirants. Except its essentially an underdeveloped town, or a lil developed village. Yet, ironically, here, noone wears anything short of Versace, Gucci, Dolce & Gabbana and Live's (no, thats not a typo, atleast not from my side). And the copiers couldn make them less like the originals. Even if they tried. ...